Secret Hat Club

My first baby was due in February 2004, and while we waited for her to be born, I taught myself how to knit a tiny pink baby hat. I should say, I retaught myself how to knit. One summer, my grandmother taught me to knit on her porch. The wind blowing in my hair, I still remember my tiny fingers trying to hold everything in place while making the wool move in the correct way. She was patient and kind, showing me over and over again how to knit. My grandmother was my favourite adult as I grew up. She seemed to know everything and was genuinely gentle with me, her oldest granddaughter. She birthed six children, was a nurse and was an enthusiastic helper. 

I often think of her when I knit baby hats. It's like I'm connecting to her kindness and generosity. I continued to knit after my daughter was born. Initially, it was for my children, family and friends. The hat was just a small tiny gift for a sweet new baby. Then there was a birth where the experience profoundly touched me. I didn't know what to do with myself. So I knit a hat and gave it to the family. The client cried, and so did I. We had been through something unbelievable together, and this tiny hat somehow demonstrated that we were connected in a tangible way. It was a turning moment in the early part of my midwifery career. I began to notice I would knit after attending births, especially when they were emotional, or I had to digest the experience. Knitting became meditative, allowing me the time to process and reflect. The hat represents this process and my gratitude for the space I inhabit as a midwife. It is such an honour to be someone's midwife. 

Initially, I would joke when I gave a hat to my client, "You're a part of The Secret Hat Club now".  They would laugh as they fit the hat on their sweet newborn's head. I'd try to explain why I was giving them a hat, but sometimes I would smile and say, "It was my absolute pleasure". I love being a midwife and would like to share these little hats with anyone who wants them. Now that my children are older and I have more time, I am able to knit. Below you will see my hand-knitted newborn hats, which are for sale. If you wish to join the club, email me at SarahLeslieRM@gmail.com.